# Forgiveness

## Guided Meditation

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Systematic Forgiveness
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## Practice Visual

<img src="https://2476744396-files.gitbook.io/~/files/v0/b/gitbook-x-prod.appspot.com/o/spaces%2FFtfcR0gXrnJrT6J9QcUt%2Fuploads%2Fveok4LVE34jt6Z202mIH%2Ffile.drawing.svg?alt=media&#x26;token=df88a280-8253-4763-8c04-c59f820b4614" alt="" class="gitbook-drawing">

### Core Instructions

<table><thead><tr><th width="140"></th><th></th></tr></thead><tbody><tr><td>Objective - Why?</td><td><ul><li>Forgiveness is pleasant</li><li>Trains 'letting go', a valuable skill</li><li>Releases guilt&#x26;resentment</li></ul></td></tr><tr><td>Basic Instruction - How?</td><td><ul><li>Physically &#x26; Mentally release &#x26; relax</li><li>Allowing to arise naturally or bringing up specific Themes</li><li>Utilize phrases 'I forgive me/you/etc.' </li></ul></td></tr><tr><td>Attention Method</td><td>/</td></tr><tr><td>Focus Range</td><td><ul><li>Release in the mind &#x26; body</li><li>Phrases to activate forgiveness</li><li>Experience of Forgiveness</li></ul></td></tr><tr><td>Consider</td><td><ul><li><p>Often, emotional discomfort may arise</p><ul><li>Take care of yourself, pausing or stopping whenever needed</li></ul></li><li><p>Patience</p><ul><li>Learning to forgive, to let go is a process</li><li>No need to hurry. Practicing gently and nature will do the rest</li></ul></li></ul></td></tr></tbody></table>

## Elaboration

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{% tab title="Instructions" %}

## Introduction

In this practice we are training the skill of 'causing' forgiveness. The tools used to facilitate this are  physically and/or mentally releasing effort that underlies the holding unto guilt or resentment, as well as phrases to generate forgiving & caring intent.

## Practice - Systematic Forgiveness

### Transition in

* Posture
  * Settling into one's posture
* Becoming aware
  * Noticing the current experience
    * Sights, sounds, touch

### Phase 1 - Creating a Safe Space (Relaxing physically, mentally & kindly)

### **Phase 1.1 - Relaxing** [**physically**](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/equanimity/2-physical-softness-and-restlessness)

Relaxing physically on every exhale

Letting go of effort that underlies physical tension

* jaw, neck, shoulders, etc.

#### **Phase 1.2 - Relaxing** [**mentally**](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/conditioning/broken-reference)

With the next exhales, relax & let go of tension of the eyes, eyelids and area behind the eyes (the frontal lobe of your brain)

Relaxing intellectual activity, intention to understand, giving up any concern

#### **Phase 1.3 - Inviting** [**Kindness**](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/conditioning/loving-kindness)

Invite kindness and caring to your experience of letting go, releasing

You may facilitate this with [a smile of your eyes and/or lips, a bodily touch or self-hug or more](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/loving-kindness#method-of-activation)

### Phase 2 - Forgiving while Letting go

* Note
  * If specific persona or situations arise, feel free to directly address it with e.g., 'I offer forgiveness'
  * You may use any phrases that resonate with you, that is, facilitate forgiveness

#### **Forgiveness from others**

'If I have harmed anyone, intentionally or unintentionally, please forgive me'

#### **Forgiveness towards others**

'If anyone has harmed me, intentionally or unintentionally, I forgive you'

#### **Forgiveness towards myself**

'For all the ways I have harmed myself, intentionally or unintentionally, I forgive myself'

#### **Forgiveness towards Life**

'For all the ways Life has harmed me or anyone, I offer forgiveness'

### Phase 3 - Creating a Forgiving Space

* Combining Phase 1 & 2

Tuning into the releasing aspect on every exhale, on every release of physical or mental tension/effort.

Tuning into the kindness available on every release

Tuning into the forgiving aspect on every release

Creating a safe space for you with every release&#x20;

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### Why do we practice how we practice?

#### Relationship between physically & mentally relaxing with forgiveness

Forgiveness can be experienced as a letting go, freeing up or abandoning of e.g., guilt or resentment. Similarly, physical or mental relaxation is also experienced as a letting go. Hence, we use the body & mind as tool to help & teach how to forgive.

Eventually, as we become skilled in this relationship, we have the gift of forgiveness on every physical or mental release.

#### Creating a safe space

Forgiveness can be a difficult experience. Sadness, anger and similar may arise. Hence, it is important to create a safe space in order to healthily welcome anything that may arise.

We do this by increasing our [non-interference](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/conditioning/broken-reference) via relaxing and activating [loving-kindness](https://www.luisburgis.org/practice-guides/skills/conditioning/loving-kindness).

### Q\&A&#x20;

#### Why should I forgive intentional immoral actions?&#x20;

Distinguishing between our subjective experience (inside world) and objective experience (outside world).&#x20;

Forgiveness applies to our subjective experience, releasing of guilt or resentment.&#x20;

* Immoral or moral is irrelevant for your peace of mind. Forgiveness is forgiveness. Resentment is resentment. You may resent moral actions or immoral actions, Forgive moral actions or immoral actions. Intentionally or unintentionally. As long as you experience guilt or resentment, there is opportunity to let go.Forgive everything, to have a peace of mind.

Forgiveness does not mean to stop condoning or denying the existence of immorality/injustice.

* &#x20;Actually, when able to forgive, meaning to let go of all guilt or resentment, we have a more balanced mind, hence being able to take more skillfull decisions.

&#x20;&#x20;

&#x20;
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{% tab title="Progress" %}

<table><thead><tr><th width="134">/</th><th>Level 1 - Non-Skilled</th><th width="161">Level 2 - Skilled</th><th>Level 3 - Maturity</th></tr></thead><tbody><tr><td>Essence</td><td>Unable to forgive &#x26; holding unto guilt and resentment<br><br>Unaware of whether forgiveness or resentment is present</td><td>Ability to partially forgive &#x26; let go of guilt, resentment<br><br>Aware of it's presence</td><td>Ability to forgive completely - oneself, others, and life. Even for immoral actions.</td></tr><tr><td>Elaboration</td><td> </td><td></td><td></td></tr><tr><td>Example</td><td>Experiencing guilt or resentment regularly while not knowing how to manage</td><td>Experiencing guilt or resentment and knowing how to manage</td><td>Rarely experiencing guilt or resentment, and almost natural to let go of it</td></tr></tbody></table>
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{% tab title="Daily Life" %}

#### Intention

* Becoming clear about forgiveness & resentment
  * Noticing grudges & resentment towards myself, others or life
  * Noticing forgiveness towards myself, others or life
* Becoming clear about the impact
  * Noticing the impact towards my well-being and/or of others
* Conditioning Forgiveness
  * Whenever you desire, practice forgiveness towards yourself, others or life

#### Common Scenarios

* Perfectionism
  * 'Not being good enough'
* Feeling defensive when receiving criticism or hostility
* Observing how others are acting immorally and holding resentment towards
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